I like this video

Broadcast 2000 "get up and go" Full from Jordan Clarke on Vimeo.

28

Keith Green was only 28 years old when he died.
Jim Elliot was only 28 years old when he died.
Both of them did great things for Jesus.
Both of their wives went great lengths to continue living the legacy of sharing Christ's love.
Both were wholly committed to Jesus Christ.

If we asked them about all the great missionary works they did, I imagine they'd boast about their love for Jesus. I don't' think they'd boast about the missions work they did. Their radical commitment, the fruits of their labor... were all an outflow of a single heart-wrenching devotion to Jesus Christ. As Piper says, it's about "white-hot" worship. Not about missions. Missions exists because worship doesn't.


I turn 28 in about 6 months. Let me follow in the footsteps of Love.

Piano

Half of my childhood was spent practicing the piano. "Imagine you're in a meadow", said my teacher. It was for a part in the song that was meant to be idyllic and soft; a moment that would replicate an imaginary wandering through a meadow. The song would descend and move toward angrier notes. "Imagine you're angry.. at something.. at someone...", he'd say. The notes crescendoed and waited in anticipation for the emotions to surge through. What was I angry about? Anger conjured up as I thought of last night when dad fought with mom. I marked off on my calendar each day they fought. Last night was the 20th time this month. "Okay, descend.. descend...let the notes fall in gentle willowy whispers". The anger transformed into a strong, gentle longing for peace.

"Stop playing! It's awful!", my brother would cry. I'd yell back, "5 more minutes!!!". The imaginary meadow, angry memories and quiet longings for peace slowly began drawing back into the recesses of my mind.

amen.

“Beware of your ceaseless striving after a righteousness so great that you no longer appear as a sinner in your own eyes and do not want to be a sinner. For Christ dwells only in sinners.” Martin Luther

after all our hands have wrought, He forgives.

sin is intensifying around me and over me. in the midst of this battle, i hear Christ saying, he's won.. he's won..he's won. there is no longer anything impossible for him.

he's redeemed me from the miry clay. from the affairs. from foolish threats of divorce. from petty friendships with the world. cheap tastes of freedom.

he still beckons me to come. his plans are better. he plans to have me as his own.

God, i pray that I'd be yours alone.

failure

that heavy blanket of shame
pressed against my body
put me to sleep

the onion

sin - that monster that morphs and
transforms into multitudes of sin
is growing layers over fresh wounds

creativity

where has my life gone? i wonder that i haven't invested more time in living, creating and imagining.

Jesus

It's not a silly little moment
It's not the storm before the calm
This is the deep and dyin breath of
This love we've been workin on

http://www.kimopress.com/biograph.htm
http://www.qhpress.org/quakerpages/qwhp/soma.htm

OIL

OIL was such a blessing.
I felt encouraged, affirmed and refreshed.
many lessons from the past were reaffirmed.
One thing I felt called to repent over was the way I treated family.
All my life I thought I was a good sister, but I wasn't. I don't know how to be committed, loyal, consistent or loving. I suck at it.
The song "pleasing to you" really spoke to me.
This is the year of "white" and it's a year that I want to set apart for Christ -- to be holy, pure, setapart and in Christ. The song "pleasing to you" speaks to all these things.

I feel broken and contrite over how I treated family. I felt God really calling me to repent over these relationships. As I'm thinking about this, I can think back to relationships from church that i have neglected, taken for granted and left -- because I didn't want to get hurt, because I was afraid...etc.

(to be continued)

Hello 2008

Hello 2008.
wonderful even numbered year.
-the Word is as honey on my lips. It can be chewed and savored a million times over. You can listen to the same sermon over and over again and still not know enough. God is infinite...I can never know him enough
-I am your chosen one. You are disciplining me.. I want to submit to you and know you as my master.
-Transformation cannot be calculated. Things just happen. I cannot predict anymore.
-All my efforts are in vain. My perfectionism vs. God's perfectionism.
-Are alll my words seasoned with salt? A product of the thoroughness of Christ in my heart? I am learning to be led in the Spirit.
-If you are led by the Spirit, you are led into battle against sin.
-I am responsible for chewing and partaking the Word
-I must remain in you.
-I'm learning to filter through what I've learned and seen about church/God. I am relearning everything, being born again in my thoughts.
-Old skin vs. new skin. God wants me to have a new heart.
-It's not about learning many new lessons, but about learning 1 lesson really well. I'm so used to gathering new thoughts and lessons each week that I forget to savor Christ. I can get so caught up in gathering information.
-I've been humbled. I can no longer assume things about people.
-I'm learning to see people positively. I realized I have such a bitter perception of people. I do not know how to love people.
-Without love, I am a clanging cymbal
-Learning to not be condescending in my speech. As Christ is in my life, He is transforming my speech and my heart.
-Grandma? My perception of her is changing. I've grown bitter, but it is a good kind of bitterness. I must feel it before moving forward.
-Christ is alive in my life. Even yet while I was a sinner, Jesus died for me.